Juxtapose

Up early (again) after another late night of second shift (again). Crawled into bed beside a sleeping husband at a few past midnight after kicking off my germy shoes and peeling off my MRSA laden scrubs at the door. Awake for another hour feeling Baby doing yoga in my belly and mentally dotting the I's and crossing the T's of my shift. I'm always exhausted after work but I do wonder if there will ever be a time when I don't have to relive the entirety of the previous eight to fourteen hours of my work shift in my brain before I can fall asleep.

This morning... Dishes. Laundry. Food shopping. Reading my Bible and keeping warm in the sunlight by the bay window with my toes propped up on the heating duct to take off the chill. Drinking my Ovaltine and taking my vitamin like a good girl. Enjoying quiet. No callbells. Nobody detoxing and yelling. No suicidal patients. No angry doctors and no cussing nurses. No beeping heart rhythm alarms, no running for the crash cart. No seizures and no bleed outs. No excitement for today. Just quiet. I enjoy the challenge and the pace of work - the adrenaline and the gogogo - but sometimes just quiet is enough for one day.